I grew up in a VERY Catholic family. I went to Catholic school with the nuns and priests.
At one point my mom and dad were both Eucharistic Ministers, both of my older brothers were altar boys and I at the young age of 10, was a lector.
What I gathered in that upbringing was that god was a judge. He would let me through the gates to heaven only if I behaved a certain way.
If I misbehaved “enough” I was going to hell.
I was taught to live in fear on so many levels. Can’t make a mistake or I am going to hell and I will be shaking hands with Beelzebub himself.
Coming into recovery I became free. The others were practicing spiritual principles and not religious rules. I could eat meat on a Friday during lent and nobody cared!
I was free to develop my own understanding of God – it is a beautiful thing.
It has taken time…years to undo all of the previous mental conditioning.
But today…..
GOD to me is pure energy that is the source of life. It is in everyone and everything.
It does not judge or discriminate. It creates and continues to create. It is inside of my “shell” my human body and is the eternal part of me.
I find these beliefs (right or not) right for me…they are far more pleasant than what I was taught.
I think part of growing up is looking at your parents critically and objectively, and then deciding if thats how you want to be.
My parents only stayed together for appearances sake, and in reality they barely spoke to each other
It was hard growing up in that environment because there weren’t any positive role models around. It took some years to sort it all out, because you learn bad stuff off your parents without realising it.
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Thank you for sharing- it was a VERY similar situation growing up i my home. My parents stayed together because โsocietyโ said they souls and they ended splitting up anyways after all.
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It took me such a long time to be able to receive, “You are loved beyond your capacity to understand.”
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Beautifully said ! This kind of realization is part of a spiritual process, you have no one in between, it’s only the creator & you.
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Thank you ๐ ๐
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Religion is like a “code of good practice” and not like a book full with restrictions (thats what men made from it)
Belief is something personal that you have to fill in for yourself. For me I find religion and belief in nature.
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Thank you ๐
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A special post, beautifully expressed! ๐
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Thank you ๐๐
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Amen! โค
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peace like the river
faith and trust sliver
shiver to sin
addicted to something
more
is all
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Catholicism is about forgiveness. I am sorry to hear that you lived in fear and that forgiveness wasn’t emphasized in your upbringing.
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