Carrying the message 3/18

It is said in recovery that we can only keep what we have by giving it away.

Last night myself and 3 other addicts went to a detox facility to share what happened to us, how we got clean and how we stay clean today.

Every time I enter into one of these places it is difficult but beautiful at the same time. It is hard because I remember just how sick I was. It is beautiful because I remember just how sick I was.

The four of us speaking went in to a room of about 40 addicts. That in itself can be quite intimidating.

But the room was kind. I could feel it. All of the people were very respectful and grateful that we were there.

After we shared, the best part of the meeting happens…the patients come up and talk to us.

One boy came up to me straight away and said I am 19 the same age your son is now. This young boy was so beautiful – his features were like something out of a magazine. Blue blue eyes, white smooth healthy looking skin and the shiniest red hair I have ever seen on a male.

I hugged him and asked him his name…he said his name was Sapphire. He told me that he had been homeless since 16 years old and living on the streets. His family went to the court and had him “sectioned” to the detox. Meaning sent against his will.

He told me that his mom and dad refused to accept him as he is. He told me he had been struggling with sexual identity issues and at first he thought he was gay but then he was realizing he was transgender.

The problem was not that he was struggling to figure out where he fits in this world. The problem was that his mom and dad refused to show him love as he is.

He would rather live on the streets and be free….. than live in an environment where he feels unloved.

I always learn something when I put myself out there. I leave the detox with a heavy heart knowing that maybe 1 or 2 out of the 40 people will actually make it.

And at the core of that is they will leave this earth not feeling loved or accepted.