Even Jesus got angry 3/23

See now I’m pissed.

Yesterday’s post was in regards to me touching upon some pain of being a single mom…it was like I had never realized it before and it was quite painful and I did not really understand it.

Now, I have had a good cry and I am angry and I understand why.

I am angry because not only has my x-husband not been a part of helping raise his son…what he has done…has made him feel less than in more ways that I care to even explain.

Bottom line is that he has hurt my son rather than helped him. I made excuses for his dad and tried have compassion for him.

I would not let a stranger treat my son this way and I let his dad.

I am so angry at this man that I have never really stood up to. I have never expressed the anger, because I honestly have not felt it like this….until now.

I must have felt some type of guilt because I was in active addiction during our marriage. But since our divorce I have been clean and completely turned my life around and have been the sole support system for our child.

To say “our” child is a joke.

I have had to protect my son from his own father. Continuously rescue him from horrible situations that his father put him into.

He degraded him…and was unkind to him.

I am so mad. Who does that? Who acts as if they do not accept and love their son.

I always thought that this was only affecting my son…I was wrong.

Hell..I’m mad at myself too.

Face the music Danielle…feel – deal – heal.

******ok I know this is not very spiritual but if I had a picture of him I would post it so you could all be pissed at him too! ha ha (just kidding)…not really

Published by gracefuladdict

I am a true addict living my life one day at a time in recovery. I have been substance free -meaning NO drugs or alcohol since 5/23/10. My intention is to share my experiences daily in the hopes to free others from the fears of being who they truly are. My wish is to bravely tell my truth so others can tell theirs as well. I want to be free of self hatred and doubt. I want to live a life of joy, kindness, love and grace. Thank you!

40 thoughts on “Even Jesus got angry 3/23

  1. Yes. Be angry. You should, it was wrong and unjust. God hates injistice. Feel it. Own that anger. Then get as quickly as possible to forgiveness. Be angry, feel it, but staying there extended time only hurts you and your son. I did that. I lived angry too long- anger at my ex and at myself for not standing up for us. Forgiveness removed the concrete from between our toes and healing started. All with God.😃❤

    Liked by 4 people

    1. Yesss❤️I’m learning to feel it -accept it and then move forward. It’s amazing because in my past even during recovery these things would stick to me like glue…but now that I’m learning to feel it – it passes through much quicker❤️💜💜thank you – loves the concrete between our toes analogy 🌈

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  2. Inhale and exhale… Something wrong and unjust, makes you angry, but don’t keep this feeling so much longer, pleasse, because it does’t helps you. You are smart you can find the way for negociation, with him. Keep well.
    Inhale and exhale…
    Blessings.
    Elvira

    Liked by 3 people

  3. Have you ever heard of Charlotte Kasl? She’s written several books about recovery … I own several of them. One of the things I like about her is that she says that recovery for women is radically different than for men & one of these reasons is the issue of ANGER.

    Women need their anger. Often, realizing their anger is the beginning of their recovery. I know it was for me (back in 1989, a full year before I first got sober). Realizing that I had deep-seated anger … often against people that I thought I loved … & that I did love … was a eye-opening experience. I didn’t know what to do with that emotion or that self-knowledge & it made me look for answers.

    In AA, we are told repeatedly that anger will take us back to drunkenness but I do not believe this is true. We all get angry & if every instance of anger led to drinking, then there would be more drunks than there are sober people, which were are not. There is a difference between feeling anger, acting on that anger, acting out in anger, & drinking because of that anger.

    Why shouldn’t you be angry about your son’s father? It’s completely & totally understandable.

    I have similar feelings about my own son’s father. Because I am older than you are & my son is almost thirty at this point, my anger has mellowed into something else … disgust, maybe. That’s OK. That’s progress … not perfection. I don’t need perfection. I don’t even want it.

    My point is … use your anger to go forward. Don’t beat yourself up about feeling angry. Pray for your son’s father if that’s what you think you should do … but the most important thing is to talk about it … with your home group, your sponsor, your therapist, your best friend, whoever helps you process this anger. Talking about it is the only thing that will diffuse this emotion.

    Hugs

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I have not heard of her before. But I definitely know that anger is good. It actually is an improved emotion than sadness or helplessness. It IS necessary to accept and grow from ❤️I absolutely agree to not suppress it but not live in it either 🌈 Thank you again 🙏

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  4. Injustice is always wrong, but at some time you have to let go and allow God to handle your husband and all of his evil actions. Don’t hurt yourself and your beloved son by harboring bitterness. Place it at the feet of the Lord and let Him do what He does best. He will restore your heart and bring you through this in ways that will amaze you.

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  5. As women, we are socialized to believe that we should not embrace anger. But anger can be a healthy emotion just like any other emotion…and from what you are sharing here, you SHOULD be angry! Not getting stuck in anger will be important, but it sounds like being able to experience this emotion will help to release some of the past. Thank you for sharing 🙂

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  6. Girlfriend you are one of the strongest woman I know. I will go egg the house 🤣🤣🤣🤣 thought I would throw a little humor in this one. Love you Chooch!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. There is nothing wrong with being pissed off, angry, upset, hurt, in disbelief. These are real emotions. And they need to be let out or they build up and fester like a sore.

    I know you have already taken this to God so just leave it there and move forward. I’m sure you’ll pick it back up but just keep laying at the the throne until you do not feel like picking it back up.

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  8. His father is afraid to acknowledge his son, regardless of who, what or where he is in his life. But I would say that he is just passing on what his father/mother/both passed onto him. He probably was not acknowledged by them in some way and does not know how to do it any other way. And yes, he has to face that, and yes, your son is the destination of that treatment. No, it isn’t fair…but…as hard as it is, it is the journey for them both to face themselves. Just like your journey, it took great courage, great love and a lot of anger to break its hold of your heart…and it is only because of that courage ‘from’ going through such pain that the unconditional love that is covered over by it can be found, truly appreciated for what it is ‘because’ of what you have gone through. And yes, sometimes you just want to scream, throw a boot or two and then slowly realize that no, we don’t want to be what he is by doing that. Big hugs dear lady, step back and hard as it is, just show your son your love so he can see the difference, and change because of it ❤️ 🙏🏽 🦋

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    1. I believe that i ignored and suppressed it all until now because I was unable to face it correctly until now. Divine timing and gods grace allowing me to face and move through swiftly and learn and lean in the direction of my soul and my becoming ❤️🌈❤️

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      1. That it is dear lady, the Grace that it all is, the timing that this world is…is exactly the unconditional love we have been given…and the journey to uncover it within each of us ❤️ 🙏🏽 🦋

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  9. Listen I don’t need a pic because I am already angry with you. But anger is the best motivation to turn a weird situation into the BEST thing that could have ever happened! Sending you nothing but positive vibes

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