It stopped working 5/13

I have heard many recovering addicts report that the drug of their choice just stopped working. The high was no longer a high. The “fix” was no longer a fix for anything.

I too experienced a period where I could not get drunk enough or high enough to erase or ignore or bury the pain. The stuff just stopped working.

I would still chase the high and purchase the pills and booze with some sort of hope of relief. This is how sick the disease of addiction can become.

In my life today I have to find other sources for relief. Writing and telling the truth has become one way that has been such a pleasant surprise.

The act of chasing things has subsided tremendously as well. I am learning to allow. To acknowledge where I am, adapt to it and then allow life to just come on through.

There are surprises and beauty around every corner. Fear is becoming less and love is becoming more.

Damn this sober life thing is pretty great!

Published by gracefuladdict

I am a true addict living my life one day at a time in recovery. I have been substance free -meaning NO drugs or alcohol since 5/23/10. My intention is to share my experiences daily in the hopes to free others from the fears of being who they truly are. My wish is to bravely tell my truth so others can tell theirs as well. I want to be free of self hatred and doubt. I want to live a life of joy, kindness, love and grace. Thank you!

10 thoughts on “It stopped working 5/13

  1. Just like opening a present, excitement in what could be inside, and amazement when you finally see it. We just had to retune our hearts so we could see something that was always there…but just had a blindfold around it. Great post healer, I can hear the sight in your words 😀 ❤️ 🙏🏽 🦋

    Liked by 4 people

  2. Sometimes you can get a high from just cleaning a dirty room and then sitting in it peacefully…orderliness all around. That’s what I’m going to do today. After moving…boxes of thirty year old crap are piled high. At the end of the day the boxes will be gone and I will finally be able to sit at my old desk again.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. I never had time to do anything worth doing. All I did was chase the booze and drug on a daily basis for 30year. Yup 24/7. Now my life consist of peace and joy. God, fellowship family, family. Life is so beautiful sober. I actually do projects…working on photos. Arranging them for my children to keep at their homes. Who has time for drugs/alcohol. I’m too busy living a righteous life🙏❤️

    Liked by 1 person

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